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August 13th, 2009 by Dr. Phil

Generation Me

dollarsI’m reading a book entitled Generation Me: Why Today’s Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled — And More Miserable Than Ever Before, by Jean M. Twenge, Ph.D.  It’s pretty interesting, actually.  It deals with a concept that we’ve talked about on the show in the past; that we seem to have a generation of entitled children.

I find this particularly interesting because we are kind of at a “crash point” right now, because we are in such an economic turndown. Most parents cannot even almost meet the expectations of kids — be they 5 or 25 years of age — because with job loss, housing foreclosures, gas prices through the roof … etc… it’s tough enough just to make ends meet!

But it’s more than just about money. It appears that we’ve lapsed into a phase where we reward children just simply for existing, rather than for achieving or performing.  If you don’t think so, just follow a Little League baseball team or a small fry basketball league, and you’ll see that every kid on the team gets a trophy at the end of the year, regardless of whether they ever won a game or even scored a run or a basket. Now I’m all about building self-esteem, but doesn’t there have to be some connection between conduct and confidence, performance and reward and between choice and consequence?

And I guess the real question is: Is it too late? Or, do we need to shift into some serious “re-parenting,” where we make sure that we instill in our kids an understanding of how the world really works?  You may let your kids get away with murder because they are “absolutely the most precious, wonderful, cute and adorable” little tykes who ever walked the face of the earth, but when they get in the dog-eat-dog real world of competition for grades, jobs and advancement in life, they may be in for a shock.  Is it possible that we are cheating, and in fact, crippling our kids by giving them too much in exchange for too little?

I would love to hear your thoughts on this.  In fact, as I’m writing this, I’m deciding that we need to do a show on this topic, and have a good, honest dialogue among parents.  So if you want to participate, leave a comment, and be sure to share your thoughts here

Maybe you’re someone that recognizes a problem and needs help, or you’re someone who wants to debate the topic. Either way, let’s get together.

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327 Responses to “Generation Me”

  1. Dorothy Edwards says:

    I have 5 grow daughters and 1 son, I was married to a drunk for 20 some years to be honest I was just the opposite I came from a middle class Christian parents wanted for nothing but got my first job when I was 14 and was made to pay room and board because my parents wanted to prepare us for adulthood but the money we gave them was givin back many times over. when I got married I was like alot of girls then marriage was the only way to leave home so i was married at 17 went from having everything I needed to having nothing, But I have seen the differents between my children who had nothing and some that had everything. Long story made short is if ever their was a Mother more proud of their children and I tell them often, My oldest daughter has tramatic stress disorder from losing my oldest grandson 10 years age on a gun accident, I have twin daughters one works in the office of several Doctors and she just got promoted her Twin sister lives in San Diego Ca. she is a HR for a company there, My son he repairs and builds houses, My next daughter is disable, My Baby daughter just passed her seven and works for a large company as her Bosses assistant , I am very proud of them because they did this on their own even my two daughter that are sick . I appolize to my kids all the time but my children say Mama we would not have had it any different because what they went through made them the Adults they are now.

  2. Anna says:

    i was laughing at how rediculous these girls are. im 18 and have been paying my own phone bill since i was 16!!! these girls need a dose of reality. seriously!!!! i dont even have a car yet or my license. my parents dont pay for that stuff. i dont even have enough money for college next year and these girls are complaining how hard it is in college. i would love to go to college. yes my parents do pay for some things like chior and a few things here and there. they really need to know what its lke to work for what they have. it makes me sick to see girls like this where mommy and daddy buy them whatever they want and they dont appreciate it and that jewish girl needs to get a slap. i may not be jewish but i am catholic and they are similar kind of. religion has nothing to do with who you marry hunny sorry. thank you. i wish i could have been there. these girls should try living in the life of the average person and not some spoiled brat.

  3. Roberta Roane says:

    I find these kids that are spoiled simply do not have simple life survival skills. Instead of love and support the parents gave her things. They never explained that it takes money, a career and success to be able to provide Chelsea the things and priviledges she had as a kid.

    She doesn’t even get that what she did is wrong.

  4. Jill says:

    I am an Emotional Support teacher in a high school. I see “entitled” children all day long. When a child’s behavior is so bad we need to have a conference with the parents, it soon becomes apparent why this child behaves the way they do.
    I believe we reap what we sow. If we have raised children that we allow to run wild, get everything they want, and never earn the value of a dollar, why should we be surprised when when they throw tantrums as adults because mom and dad decided to cut off funds. I see children daily who have way too much “stuff” and not enough of their parents time or care. I had to do ‘tough love’ with my youngest child, and risk losing his love forever, but after sinking to the depths, he rallied himself and now has two B.S. degrees and a lovely wife. I refused to give him money, but paid for books after each 3.0 semester, gave him essentials for Christmas and birthdays for many years, and didn’t ever bail him out. Now I tell him he is a self made man and should be the proudest man I know.

  5. Jean says:

    I grew up with a father who was at the beginning of the Baby Boomers who told me “I would “Bleep” my boss at noon and come home and tell my parents I am working elsewhere at the end of the day.” My grandparents went through the depression; my parents saw 20% interest in the 80’s and brought on the convenience of day-to-day life because there power as a baby boomer and the crisis the States brought to the rest of the World.

    The X-generation waits on the side lines doing minimum wage jobs having gone through college (which are under the poverty line) which they hate waiting for the Baby Boomers to make their exit while the government is telling businesses we need them to stay. The Y-generation has seen this and is saying we don’t want minimum jobs so we will out wait the Baby Boomers to take retirement and slide into their great jobs.

    Each generation wants more than what the generation before them had. No, I did not read the article as I don’t get the New York paper or watch your show, although the comments have been interesting to read.

  6. Jean says:

    I grew up with a father who was at the beginning of the Baby Boomers who told me “I would “Bleep” my boss at noon and come home and tell my parents I am working elsewhere at the end of the day.” and couldn’t understand why I was having a hard time getting a job. “Why do you need resume and cover letter??” He would say, “You walk through the door of the business you want to work for and ask if they have any jobs available you will be qualified for!” My grandparents went through the depression; my parents saw 20% interest in the 80’s and brought on the convenience of day-to-day life because there power as a baby boomer and the crisis the States brought to the rest of the World.

    The X-generation waits on the side lines doing minimum wage jobs having gone through college (which are under the poverty line) which they hate waiting for the Baby Boomers to make their exit while the government is telling businesses we need them to stay. The Y-generation has seen this and is saying we don’t want minimum jobs so we will out wait the Baby Boomers to take retirement and slide into their great jobs.

    Each generation wants more than what the generation before them had. No, I did not read the article as I don’t get the New York paper or watch your show, although the comments have been interesting to read.

  7. Mary says:

    I have a 21 year old daughter who thinks it is OK to lie and call me names. We have struggled to survive. My son was diagnosed when he was 5 with cancer he survived but has has a lot of health problems. I have had 5 back surgeries and 2 neck surgeries from a family disease. I had to have a serious neck surgery do to a car accident. She does nothing except call me terrible names drinks all the time and sleeps with what ever guy gives her attention. I know she has”Daddy Issues” because her dad left us when she was 4. She has put me in danger with an ex I have a restraining order with and her ex- boyfriend that has threatened me and my sons life I am at my wits end. What do I do? I am on a fixed income and really would like to move but I have no money. HELP Please!!!

  8. Ellie says:

    It’s not the 20-somethings fault that we have to continue to leech off of our parents when we are trying and failing to get good jobs. I have a Bachelor’s degree and I abhor living with my parents. I want a decent living wage. I apply to jobs daily to no avail. Is it my fault that the generation before me screwed up the economy before I had a chance to contribute to it? And I have no choice to leech off of my parents in the meantime. Hey, is the Dr. Phil show hiring? Or are they just going to keep complaining about my generation?

  9. Lori says:

    At first this show made me furious. Furious that these spoiled rotten rich kids would be allowed to get even more attention. I’m a 50-year-old female who has worked non-stop at jobs since I was 14 (babysitting before that), except for 2 3-month maternity leaves when I gave birth to my two boys, and the usual vacations.(none of which are the real trips that I really want but haven’t worked enough to afford yet) I will never know what it’s like to have the excitement of meeting Dr.Phil, Robin, & staff, because I’m just a boring person who has tried to always do right. I’ve been working at my current job for 29 years. Just finished yet another stressful week. I watch Dr. Phil, Oprah, Rachel Ray, all my favorites on the DVR when I have time to catch up. I realize that extremes are what interest people and will create ratings but I still see it as these people, no matter how dysfunctional, are privileged to be asked to do something as exciting as being on a show and meeting people. Yet they will never appreciate the gift they’ve been given. Thus, I’m once again torn between being interested/fascinated by the show, and being jealous once again, that dysfunctional/wrong is what gets attention/rewards. I am further appalled that when presented with the huge numbers of personal expenses and suggestions of what that money could go for (feeding families of 4 for years, etc.), her response was that she would have to remember that if she needed it…not what most people would have responded…wow, I could really help a lot of folks!


  10. MKirkpatrick says:

    Actually, Dr. Phil, I think that both Erica’s and Josie’s parents are responsible for their behaviors. Even though the mothers said that they wished their daughters did not feel so entitled, the mothers continue to enable them. The other day, I watched a young mother offering her 22-month-old son choices for everything (Which pants do you want to wear? Which cartoon do you want to watch? What toy would you like to play with?). The little boy was too young to be able make these choices. He threw tantrums when he didn’t immediately get what he wanted, and he was enjoying the control that his mother was giving him! I hope that he doesn’t turn out to be a little prince.

  11. Kevin McNamara says:

    I was so disturbed at the way the mother and grandmother attacked the girl who is 24 I think they had so much to do with the fact that this kid is the way she is. I was very dissapointed in Dr Phil and the way the three of them beat down this girl when she was down and out.
    I know she did things that were wrong but my God she is someone who is supposwed to belong to that family Thry talked about her like she was a stranger that robbed them. i found it so distirbing on many levels. the mother and grandmother are off the wall…so the apple does not fall far from the tree!

  12. Lulu says:

    I, too was dissappointed at Dr. Phil. As I parent, I was horrified to see that not the mom or grandma had a single tear in their eyes seeing poor Chelsea is such pain. I could not imagine my kid in such pain and not having feelings. Instead, they both seemed to smirk. I think Chelsea is right… it is all about the money with those too. I was sad that Dr. Phil did not help Chelsea!! Two against one was unfair! I sooo wanted Dr. Phil to rip into that mom.

  13. rebecca kuhn says:

    I was disappointed in DR.Phil. That little girl was crying for love. What happened to being your authentic self… The girl wants to be with horses. The proof was the clip with her and a saddle. No wonder she is over weight. That mother is awful , Love and support. Give the girl something that she loves and she will prosper. If the mother had supported her , perhaps she could be raining horses or something lese that would bring in the money the mother expects. We all start at the bottom in the muck and mus cleaning stalls. That is how you learn and grow, I msure there was another way. Bad mother!

  14. Julianne Smith says:

    This show with these young women deeply disturbed me. I feel sorry for both the girls AND their mothers! The mothers have no idea that their indulgence has created “disabled” daughters who are so self absorbed and self centered that their every waking moment is spent being concerned about themselves. There is NO lasting happiness in that kind of selfish life! These young women will spend their lives seeking to be happy, but it is honest WORK, Selfless sacrifice for others, service rendered freely and putting others before self that truely brings lasting joy.
    Because their mothers have never taught these girls these principles, they are hobbled—literally and figuratively. The best thing that could happen to these girls is to send them to Haiti ( or another comparable place) on a service mission without their mothers or their money or their “things” where they could begin to see what “real life” is all about! It would be eye-opening!

  15. Ronda says:

    My son usually gets something every time I bring him grocery shopping at Walmart. I tell him he can get something, if he is good but usually have to remind him. I sometimes use it as an escape because, I admit it, I am just tired and don’t want to play with him that day. With a new toy, he’s occupied and will leave me alone. Otherwise I will go shopping without him. Just because he has learned to expect it and we can’t afford to but him something every time.

    I should say that my son although 10 is more like 5 developmentally because of being shaken when he was 3 months. All of his teachers think he is a doll, and they spoil him also, because he has come such a long way, always wants to help and has a really good heart.

    My mom say’s I need to stop this expectation of his (getting something every time we go shopping). He does own nearly every toy there, but I don’t think I am doing him any harm. I don’t think he is greedy or even has the full ability of being selfish. He has gone through his toys with me and will offer them for charity, if he knows he doesn’t play with them anymore?

    >>>As far as Chelsea is concerned, I saw the look she gave you when you found her out. I don’t believe her. I think she is more sorry about being caught than actually doing the crime!

  16. Jacqui says:

    I have never been so effected by a program. I am a mother & grandmother. The thoughts and actions of these woman are a mirror of the Mother & Father. I am confused by their Mothers statements, they can’t decide what they want for their children. How can I blame the girls for their statements and actions. I find it a sad state of our world that this thought process is epidemic. In the community I live in is not unusual, it’s a growing, up & coming area. The kid’s here have an idea that they are not going to have to contribute in any way that is uncomfortible. Sometimes parents must be the unpopular bad guy’s. My point is we as parents & grandparents are forgetting what has made a strong & reliable generation. I have said a number of times in the last weeks the word “Honor ” is lost. I pray that we can still change this trend. Thank You Dr. Phil…Jacqui

  17. Goldie Woodhead says:

    Spoiled and Entitled was an interesting show. I couldn’t finish watching the last few minutes of it because I was annoyed with their behaviors. But to put it simply…the spoiled females were attractive but incomplete as a person. They are like an empty shell, that needs some real education on the realities of life and some sort of survival skills. They obviously can’t fend for them selves, due to their upbringing.
    I was glad that a Jewish audience member spoke up and gave her opinion. I am not Jewish but it is a shame that these women only want to date Jewish men for what they can gain. They will probably never know a meaningful relationship that is based on love and kindness, and two people being a team. What a pity and what a shame. I am grateful that I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth and I am grateful that I had parents that gave me a clue about life and what it takes to really live! And I am grateful that I wasn’t taught to date someone merely for their prosperity. We were not raised to be selfish, but instead we were raised to be selfless. And those lessons are priceless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Submitted by Goldie in Pa.

  18. wendy says:

    watching this show-spoiled and entitled, made me so grateful for the parents that i have. my mom passed away when i was 29, but in the too short time we had her , she taught me and my sisters, the lessons who make us who we are today. kindness and empathy towards others, independence , and a sense of humour to deal with life’s ups and downs, that was well needed after watching spoiled and entitled’s josie talking about how she just had to marry a director, or some other rich man. i applaud the jewish woman for speaking up and addressing josie. i may not have been raised like these girls, but i’ll take my life over theirs any day of the week, “thanks mom!!!!”

  19. Chris says:

    Amazing really… This is in no way the girls fault… its the parents, but what would you expect… America is a country where the gap between incomes are huge… i mean rly… Some have nothing and others have more than enough to provide for 10 families…

    I live in a country in Europe called Denmark, we pay over 50 % in taxes, and even though you would see that as socialism and communism, we have more freedom than you… We have freedom to chose what we want, im attending the equivilant of college/high school and its completly free for me… i actually get paid to study, i get close to 500 $ a month, which does not have taxes applied since my parents are divorced. Those with parents who have plenty of money gets around 200 $ which is the minimum. We have the ability to choose if we want to study or not, and that also closes the gap between people… Yes ofcourse some have more than others, it is rare that you see a person not aware of what they have… but then again what do you expect from a country who lets their poor and sick get left behind… Long live Consumerism, Capitalism and Oligarchy

  20. Denise says:

    I do agree that nowadays we are raising a generation of spoiled and entitled children. But I believe it is not only us as parents that are at fault. Our children are taught now that they dont have to listen to their parents or suffer any consiquences since all they have to do is pick up the phone! “I’m calling my .. (other parent)”, I’m calling c.p.s; I’m going to call the cops” . Socioty is teaching our children that if they are punished anything beyond a stern scolding, that they have all these options to get the parent “punished”. Weither it be the other parent in a divorced situation, or making up lies to have the parent investigated on alegations of child abuse! When I was growing up if i told a lie, missed curfew, or was just “bad” , I was scared of what my parents may do. They NEVER laied a hand on me, but I knew the option was there lol, or that they could take something away from me. NEVER EVER did the thought cross my mind that I could go to my guiadance counceller at school and say that I wasnt happy at home… and have them be getting calls from the school, cops, or c.p.s. or have ppl show up at their door. I do believe that these systems are in place to protect the children that actually need it, but there are many children that I know have used these to turn the tables. Parents now are afraid to do anything but tip toe around their kids and keep then appeased. I have no idea how or if its even possible to change this, but I hope that something does change since its just so easy to abuse the system. and useing up precious time that needs to be spent on the children that are actually in need of help!!!

  21. Chris says:

    It is not the society which shapes the children its the parents, and if they do not it is the society which does, and then it is still the parents fault for not doing it…

    Its very easy, just dont spoil them that way, make them learn the worth of money… If they need money, make them take a job and then pay them some extra for every hour they work

  22. Christy says:

    I am a bit disappointed that Dr. Phil did not offer any real advise to the two girls on his show today. Both are ill prepared to survive life and need a great deal of help – perhaps more than he could provide in an hour show. It was hard to watch. Without some professional guidance, these two, each with their own individual set of problems, have a poor chance of living a happy life.

  23. Kristin says:

    Dr Phil,

    First I want to say that I agree that American children are at risk of being very spoiled, self-centered, and filled with an entitlement attitude. We don’t even need to see extreme examples like the two girls on your show to know this, but I do have to say that I was more disturbed by the tone of the show today (11/22/10) and attempts to “help” those girls than I was by the girls themselves.

    Yes, they were offensive, but if someone offends you, do (generic) you resort to screaming and name-calling? If (Dr. Phil) you really want to help someone, do you really find Ms. Cutrone to be a candidate for that? I, honestly, did not find her to be any more in touch with reality than those girls. Her reality is high fashion and New York snobbery. How was she so different? I was stunned by her extremely rude behavior when Josie came to her workplace. The hostility she directed was, not only embarrassing, but terribly uncomfortable to watch. I came very close to turning off my TV.

    What I am saying is that, if people truly believe that these girls are suffering from some mental defect (I don’t, I say it’s a moral defect), then was your show — including your audience — a constructive means of helping them?

    In general, your tone was the most stable and logical, Dr. Phil, but you erred on the side of Ms. Cutrone and that was just plain ugly. You excused her bad behavior as “just giving her opinion.” Imagine what our world would be like if that were a valid excuse for poor manners.

    I am a SAHM of 10 children. I am probably not considered in touch with the real world either. Josie and Erica would likely despise my lifestyle — and so would Ms. Cutrone. But I’d rather be dismissed than attacked.

    Thanks for allowing me a forum for expressing my opinion. I really hope you get a chance to hear and consider it.

    Kristin Small

  24. Benita says:

    The skinny of the spoiled brats was on a previous show regarding women who are spoiled and supported by parents (one of them by husband). I find their behaviour abusive and offensive. SHAME ON MOM AND DAD!!!! Also, it makes me wonder if the skinny one is trying to break into the TV or movies and using this type of media as a kick off. Either way, I find their behaviour actually makes them the ugliest women in the world.

  25. Sandra says:

    OMG, this girl Josie & her mother have serious issues. First of all, Josie you are not pretty nor sexy nor talented….so please do NOT compare yourself to Anna Nicole Smith…she was beautiful, sexy & likable…YOU are non of those things.

    As for your mother, what a terrible mother she is….she should have made you go to school & get a degree, a career instead of going on TV & begging for a rich director to marry you……because unless the guy is death, mute & blind….you will never find a man in that catergory to marry you!!!

  26. Maureen says:

    “Generation Entitlement” is what I call it. Children believe they should have the latest in high-tech gadgets, brand name clothes, etc. I discussed this with my 12 year old daughter and my 10 year old nephew. I explained, especially to my daughter, that there is a difference between being entitled to something and having things that meet basic needs, there is a difference between earning something and having it handed to you, to almost no avail. Finally, I broke it down to her something like this: You are entitled to safe shelter (it doesn’t have to be pretty). You are entitled to nutritious food (it doesn’t have to taste great). You are entitled to clothing appropriate to the season (it doesn’t have to be stylish). You are entitled to medical treatment (especially if it involves life, limb or eyesight). Everything else that you receive is a privilege.

    It may sound harsh, but I still don’t think she really gets it. She can recite it though! Why doesn’t she get it? I think its because of all of the things her classmates have and television shows that depict children being flippant to adults (and each other), understanding things their parents just don’t get, resolving issues in a fashion contrary to their parents advice and having an abundance of things that exceed most realistic budgets and needs.

    My nephew thought he had me. He announced that he was entitled to an education. I said, “Honey, you better take another look at your student handbook. You have access to an education based on your behavior. If your behavior conforms to that which is rightly expected and/or expressed, you have the privilege of attending school. If you behavior does not, you can be expelled from school permanently. And while I’m on the topic, you also have a responsibility to get and education in order to provide for yourself and your family and so that you become a productive member of society. So shape up.”

    He’s actually a very good boy and an exceptional student. These are really good kids with some really bad modeling of that which is socially acceptable or expected. They lack the necessary critical thinking skills and “go with the flow.” That used to be one of my daughters favorite statements. I told her, “dead bodies go with the flow; you might want to rethink that.” She didn’t get that either. I explained it to her. She didn’t seem to care. At least she’s polite enough to listen most of the time. I imagine her sitting there the whole time I’m talking, thinking about who she’s going to call, who said what to whom at school that day, etc.

    I am “sick and tired” of this entitlement mentality. Dr. Phil, am I entitled to be fed up?

  27. campbell says:

    Who are we kidding, Erica is every bit the diva…this girl will always be high maintenance…why are you soft stroking her…

  28. Aimie Wiley says:

    Dr Phil,
    I feel as though the show today really showed the real woman, Erica. She seems to have realized that the way she acted before was not how a woman is supposed to act. The other “girl”……….I called her a girl…SHe hasn’t even grown up yet. She talks about God. She has no clue at all. She really needs help. When her money gets cutt-off, and she realizes that she has to make her own living, I think she might change. SHe is spoiled and it is disgusting. Her mother is just like her and it is terrible. God tells us to love people and to love people the way that he does…..This girl has no clue. That is all I have to say.

  29. Steve Smith says:

    It is worse than just being spoiled.

    People are raising children that are not respectful of themselves…much less anyone else. They are raising children that have this “entitlement” mind set.
    They are raising children who think everything is about them….and proud of it.

    I say “they”…because we have raised two fine sons. No, they are not perfect…but they will be contributing members of society and now at 22 and 19…
    they make us (their parents) proud.

    All one needs to do is go on a cruise or to a hotel to see the pitiful job “breeders” are doing today. (I can not in good conscience call them parents…because they are not parenting)

  30. Jennifer says:

    yes it seems as kids these days are more spoiled and disrespectful. I blame the parents if they would learn to say no once and awhile there children wouldn’t run all over them.the kids also need to have respect for there parents. PARENTS STOP GIVING THEM WHAT THEY WANT IF THEY WANT IT BAD ENOUGH HAVE THEM EARN IT> THEN THERE LEARNING RESPONSIBILITY TO

  31. Maia says:

    I thought the show, “The Spoiled and Entitled Girls Return,” was very horrible towards Josie. Both Kelly and Dr. Phil bullied her throughout. Even though Josie may appear spoiled or self-entitled, I felt like Dr. Phil could have handled her much better. It made me cringe at how rude and mean everyone was being towards her on the show. If she does in fact suffer from a mental illness like borderline personality disorder (as Kelly suggested), then that just makes their treatment towards her much worse and the more unacceptable. Josie did not deserve to be treated the way she was on the show. I’m both shocked and appalled that this was allowed.

  32. Delia says:

    Dr. Phil,

    I’m a fairly new parent, my oldest son is 3 and my youngest is 1. The hardest thing I can do is say no to them. I want to give them everything they ask for; when they ask for it. But, I don’t. I think that by giving our children what they want when they want and more (I mean toys and things that are not necessities) that we make our children feel that they are entitled to everything and Me focused. When I was growing up, we didn’t have alot of money so I got things (toys, movies and books) on special occasions like Christmas, My Birthday and Easter. It was very rare that I got something just because I asked for it. I’m glad my parents decided to do things that way. I was more appreciative when I received things. I honestly feel bad for Josie because her mother and father (which we don’t see him anywhere) brought her up that way. I can even kind of understand that she would like to marry within her religion but the way she presented it; left something to be desired. I also could believe how Josie and her mother were disrespecting Kelly (I believe that was her name) calling her a drug addict and speaking over her when ever they got the chance. I found it funny (not haha funny) that Josie said that when she was interning with Kelly that she would do what Jesus would do towards her. I would have her watch everything she did because that was not how Jesus would have acted at all. Jesus would not have said I have $1,000 boots on I can’t carry coffee’s. Hopefully she sees herself and makes a few changes. I almost thought for a moment that no one could be so selfish and self centered unless this was all for publicy to move herself from page 6 to page 1. No press is bad press I hear so why not go all out.

    Thank you,

  33. Lillian Rush says:

    I have a 19 year old Grandaughter living living in my house. It’s so caotic and LOUD since she has moved in. Her mother never believed in punishing her in any way. Well now I see the results of that ! She has a potty mouth – gets in my face= when I try to admonish her she screams STOP and if I don’t she threatens me with physical harm. She does not work now-she did work at 4 different types of jobs and was “let go” because of her attitude. Oh I could go on. I see any hope for her would take an act of God. What to do !!!!
    Granma in Ohio

  34. Michaela says:

    Dr.Phil, That Josie girl will have a rude awakeing one day,she is a spoilt rich brat,who has had everything handed to her… boy Dr Phil if i knew how to write and word a letter you wouldnt believe my life story on abuse when i was a child and all the way through my teenage years,ohwell thats about all i have to say about that now. I LOVE Your show.Have a Blessed Day

  35. Helena says:

    Part of the reason these girls behave the way they do is because they thrive on the attention they get – even when it’s negative. I would love to see Dr. Phil spotlight girls that make the right choices and share with his audience the gifts these girls give to others and how it also benefits them. My daughter is a Junior in high school and is faced with choices that effect others everyday. Maybe not always, but the majority of the time she makes the right choices. She reaches out to other students who are being bullied, and stands up to the person doing the bullying. She is the co-president of her high school PULSE club (people understanding love serves everyone) and works at the local preschool after school 5 days a week. This summer she spent a week volunteering to help with home repairs for people who can’t do it themselves. Of course I think my daughter is someone special, but she is one of thousands of special high school students across the country who make the right choices EVERYDAY – and they do it without any expectations. They do it because it feels good.

  36. Jennifer franklin says:

    Dr. Phil, I agree that this generation is all about me, but it also has alot to do with parenting, or lack thereof. I am a proud mom to 3 beautiful girls, and 1 gentleman. (inside and out)I had my first daughter when I was sixteen, I am now twenty eight. Same age as josie, I think my mouth was on the floor for the length of the whole show. Ive never heard so much ignornance and prejudice come from ones mouth. And I live in Alabama. As a parent you want nothing but the best for your children, but its your job as a parent to show your child the skills, and encouragement to achieve their goals. And to show your children kindness, emphaty, and life skills. My 12 year old daughter has a cell phone, but with that privledge also comes with stipulations, she has chores and homework that have been designated age approriate for her before she can text, or call from her phone, and no usage after 8pm. We have raised and will continue to raise our children with guidance, love, to not be greedy, and be kind to all. No matter what the situation. I was truly shocked and embaressed for josies behavior, but soon realized the apple didnt fall far from the tree. My mom, who is my hero, and best friend always taught my sister and I that pretty is, is pretty does. As, I teach my children. Josie is not entitled, or owed the demands she feels like she is owed. Her hard work will speak for itself. As a christian I will pray that God will give her strengh and wisdom, and to teach her to be meek

  37. Kyra says:

    Hey Dr.Phil
    I am 13 years and i find that the girls on your show are really spoiled and should be on that show jersey shore because they only think about themself and think they are “celebs” like the girls on your show. They are drama queens. The jewish girl is all about her little jewish thigns i have no problem about that but you cant use a religion as an excuse. Like Erika is super like is very truthfull so that other that is reallly a “celeb” but thinks she is and i dont even now her name so she can go get a life cause personnaly she doesnt have one

  38. jones, b says:

    Pride comes before the fall.

  39. Tasha says:

    This show really bothered me! Allowing for “Entitlement” to rule is not only wrong but immoral, and teaches the wrong message to ANY AUDIENCE! SOCIALITES ARE NOT CELEBRITIES, and presenting them as such only succeeds in inflating their egos even further. People who beg for coverage by any means should be ignored for their behavior not receive a time slot! I would rather be a member of the lowest class imaginable and have values and morals, even though i am not, than be a sniveling silver-spoon fed disgrace!

  40. Karla says:

    Dr Phil

    I was seriously disappointed that these girls actually got another opportunity to get valuable airtime. So many other important issues can be discussed from your platform. However when Erica stated she did use the experience and feedback to review her life, I thought maybe some good did come out of it. Josie however was a waste of space – she has no intention to change. In the future please have shows that add to the value of the lives of people in general- people like Josie will try to use programs like yours to promote themselves and you should not let them.

  41. Bar J. says:

    Today’s Dr.Phil show: Spoiled and Entitled
    Hi Cr. Phil,
    I’m really dissapointed in you for allowing Kelly to abuse your guests on the show. Nobody deserves that. I don’t care if she’s spoiled

  42. Fay Godwin says:

    You can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear! Enough said.

  43. stephanie says:

    Just finished watching the “Entitled Girls” show….all I can say is that Josie is a sad and unhappy person. I’m not even Jewish and it is hurtful to me that she is portraying herself as a Jew. I’m pretty sure that no one in the Jewish community appreciates her hatefullness, her close-mindedness, her intolerance of others and general meaness. The fact that she is not really successful in any of her career pursuits tells you alot about her and her attitude. Even the smartest most beautiful person will not succeed if you don’t treat the people around with kindness and respect. Obviously she was raised a certain way but she is now well into her adulthood and needs to take responcibility for her life, expenses and career.
    I can appreciate the new attitude Erica seems to have and wish her well. She comes across as a generally happy person who wants to do the right thing. It has been an unfortunate thing that her parents did not prepare her for the real world. Good luck to her.

  44. Donna Martens says:

    Dr. Phil. I’m at a loss for words over these girls that are what 26 or so years old. I’m 61 and just today I was told by not one but 2 guys that they want Santa to bring me to them for Christmas, that I’m pretty and that’s the bottom line. I have a great personality and am a nice person. What do these girls think they are trying to prove. They look stupid at such a young age. They need to get in touch with reality.

  45. Veronica says:

    Dr. Phil, all I can say is I Love Kelly she is great, No nonsense I like that. You go girl!

  46. Diana says:

    why not send those spoiled brats to work at a homeless shelter serving Thanksgiving dinner. Perhaps they’ll figure out what they should truly be thankful for. Send the mother as well – it’s apparent she has no grip on reality.

  47. I think these girls are so pathetic. When a person cant take care of themselves i think it is sad. I might not be the smartest or prettiest woman but i am so thankful for what God has given me in my life and these girls really should be cut off and made to do it on there own. I have a sister with three children and she is 33 yrs old and still lives with my dad and doesnt work and i think it is the most pathetic thing i have ever seen in my life. Yes i did live with my dad and took advantage of his generosity and feel bad for it now bc i have my own child and would give her the world if i could, but i pray she goes to college and makes a great lady oneday. these children not woman need to grow up.

  48. Michael Hunt says:

    What is wrong with this generation of kids? They are so pampered and accustomed to getting things “their way”, it hae evolved into the schools too. My son Sean began going to USD 327 Kanopolis Middle School (Kanopolis Kansas) when we moved to Ellsworth earlier this year. Immediately, there were issues involving other students complaining about his body odor, with the teacher sending him to the school counselor, who then collected another set of clothing (including shoes) that they just happened to have available, took him to their admin area with the “secret shower”, and had him shower, change clothes, apply deoderant, and sent him back to class without ever contacting us (his parents) about it, nor obtaining permission do do so. We knew nothing about it until Sean returned home that day wearing different clothing and carrying the clothing he went to school with that morning in a plastic bag. The clothes in the bag did not emit an odor, so this issue sparked a heated meeting the next day with the school counselor, and we made our frustration known. When we discovered that she (the counselor) was the only one present during this “shower and change”, I advised her that she had just opened herself up to severe liability due to the possibility of accusations of improper conduct between school faculty and student. I thought we had made our point clear, that we made sure he showered, followed proper hygiene, and applied fresh clean clothing, however the issue keeps coming up occasionally. They were instructed to call us anytime an issue arises, but we still have issues with communication from them.

    The school supposedly has an anti-bullying policy, but harrassment from peers is allowed, condoned, and contributed to by school staff, because they take the actions or words of a few kids and determine that “Sean stinks”. On 11-9-10, I began to document the following in what I call the KMS BS LOG:

    Susan Manes calls wife and states kids following Sean & making faces like he smells. I awake shortly thereafter and call the school, speaking with her and arguing about bullying and harassment that is being not only condoned by staff but supported by calling parents before checking it for themselves. Threatened to remove him from school, and wished that they lose the other 2 grades too, shutting KMS down. Hung up on her after she implicated we were not making sure he showers and puts on clean clothes, etc., and stated they would if we didn’t.
    Called EES to speak w/principal – in a meeting.
    Called Sup office – Ken Arnold – out of town.
    Picked Sean up at 3:15pm and took him to ECHD (Ellsworth County Health Dept.), for documentation that he was not “smelly”. The issue was not substantiated by the ECHD, as Sean did not emit an offensive odor.
    Rcvd call from Ken Arnold @ 4:05 pm and advised of situation, he states will check it out tomorrow. I advised Mr. Arnold that every time there is an issue, we need a phone call, so I can pick Sean up and have him checked out by a 3rd party (non-biased) person.

    Another issue today with Sean, no phone call from the school, but Sean returned home with another t-shirt (not his own). After asking him about it, he stated that the kids said he “stunk”, and was making gestures putting their shirt collars up to their noses (after less than an hour at school). The school counselor accompanied him into the boys restroom (by herself) and made him change shirts and apply deodorant. She took his shirt to have it laundered (as if we don’t assure it is before he leaves home), and sent him back to class. Immediately, we demanded a meeting, and met with the school counselor(s) at the High school (after KMS she goes to EHS) at 5pm. We had yet another heated discussion about this issue, and once again, I ridiculed them for not contacting us, obtaining permission to do anything with Sean (i.e. disrobing him), and demanded they be consistent in following school policy, local laws, and contacting us anytime an issue arises, so that we could remove him from the school or have him change clothes ourselves if necessary. I again advised, that a female school faculty or staff member being alone with my son in a small area as he disrobed (even just a shirt) could bring accusations of improper conduct with a child, and she could be sitting in jail pending an investigation. I also warned that if I had to, I would push the investigation further to have the whole school under investigation, and shut it down if necessary to protect out local children. This time, they received written instructions of what we expect them to do when an issue arises, and they were instructed to communicate with each other so they all know this procedure. They are to call us so we can either bring clothes to school (he already carries deodorant in his book bag), or remove him from the school to be checked by yet another professional.

    At this point, we have 2 options: Either deal with this “BS” for the rest of his schooling (until he graduates), Sell our house and move into another school district (and farther away from my work), or contact Dr. Phil and other sources to remedy this situation once and for all. That is why I have posted this now.

    Michael Hunt
    Ellsworth, Ks

  49. DEBBY LONGLEY says:


  50. Kim Item says:

    I liked Josie!
    I don’t watch Dr. Phil very much but when I am led to do so I am always led to do so to pray and think good thoughts for someone on the show and yesterday that was for you Josie!! I was rooting YOU on Josie as I said over and over out loud; “Way to go Josie for standing up to these mean & nasty & hurtful WEAK women who are NOT strong inside like you are (even though they may have a “strong” power position on the outside world they are very weak inside) and YOU Josie, brings out that weakness I could see as YOU Josie are able to push the buttons by your strong willed and powerful Spirit you speak from deep within as YOU Josie have as you speak by the Spirit of God to some of the weakest women and even men in this world because Josie YOU have what they do not have- The True Spirit of The Living God working through YOU”. I have one word for that ‘JELOUSEY’ Josie, just read about the Old Testament prophets, -they too went though what you Josie are going through as they gave the Word of the Lord to the corrupt people and were treated very very badly by the corrupt people who would not and did not receive from them. God always told them Josie; Vengence is mine Sayeth the Lord, I will repay.
    Josie, I personally know your hard an painful path you must walk and if you are reading this know that you are NOT alone~ You have a tough calling on this earth to work with as you speak to some of the nastiest, and mean women and even men on this earth, but keep going and may God continue to give you the strength of His Spirit as I know He will as You Josie stand up to ALL the “bad” in this world and Josie do not ever fold or crumble or weaken and DO NOT ever show your weakness to the “bad” world. Only cry out only to God and those whom you can truly trust as your sweet mom as the Spirit of the Lord God is with YOU Josie!” DON”T EVER GIVE UP!!! Your reward will come when you get to Heaven :)

    God Bless You Josie :)
    I will be praying for you!!
    Love, Kim Item

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