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October 20th, 2009 by Dr. Phil


22As you probably know by now, we announced on Tuesday’s show that Jay and Erica are going to have a baby in March! I expected to be excited — but WOW, I am really excited!

I’m genuinely amazed and pleasantly surprised at what a significant event this is for me. It takes a lot to move the needle with me. I guess, I have learned to stay focused and take a pretty cerebral approach to life. But now, I have butterflies in my stomach at the idea of becoming a grandfather. I know this sounds a little poetic coming from me, but I am truly, profoundly moved by the march of time — by the passing of one generation to another. Our “baby” is having a baby.

I don’t know about you, but I have kind of frozen my two sons in time, to the point that I still can look at them and see them as very young boys, despite the fact that they are now 30 and 23 years of age! I know it’s a nostalgic habit, but I loved those years, which I guess is why they stick in my mind. I always think of Jay at around the age of 9 when he was constantly wearing T-shirts, his Hawaiian jams and floppy tennis shoes without laces. I think of Jordan at the age of 7 when he wore a bright red soccer jersey and kept his toys so meticulously organized in his room.

It’s pretty mind-boggling to realize that they have grown up, and are successfully building their own adult lives. And what’s especially overwhelming is that Jay will soon have his own child wearing T-shirts and Hawaiian jams! Robin and I didn’t miss a moment when the boys were growing up, and we plan to not miss a moment with the newest addition to our family. I’m sure we will be the stereotypical grandparents. We’ll completely spoil our grandchild, planning our days around him or her (we’ll know in a few weeks). I’m sure we’ll be buying way too many toys for birthdays and Christmas, and probably most days in between. Robin can’t wait to kidnap (errr, babysit) the munchkin! Jay is already just shaking his head, wondering what in the world has happened to his dear old Dad. And Jordan will be the coolest uncle ever! He loves children and is already excited about this whole idea.

14Well, it is what it is! One thing I do know with complete certainty is that Jay and Erica will be wonderful parents. They are naturally great with kids, and they are so loving and selfless in the way they live their lives. Our grandchild is in perfect and loving hands.

And then there is Maggie, the wonder dog. She has been an only child for all of her life, and now she will have scoot over for a new family addition and learn to share like a good dog!

So what do you think the new baby should call me? Log on to DrPhil.com and share your grandparent names.

In the comment section below, Virginia wrote:

Congratulations to all of you. Robin & Phil, you are entering a new chapter in your life. It’s hard to comprehend loving anyone the way you love your two sons …

Here’s my reply:

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278 Responses to “Grandpa”

  1. Catherine says:

    Dear Dr. Phil and Robin, What wonderful news for both of you. If you think you couldn’t love anyone more than your own children, wait until you experience the feelings in your heart when you hold your granddaughter for the first time. It is indescribable.

    And now I apologize in advance for using your blog to ask of you a great boon. I am a Canadian grandmother with 3 American grandchildren. My grandson is about to turn 7 – I have not seen him since he was 4. My daugher gave birth to fraternal twins last New Year’s Eve. She lives in California with her husband. I have never seen the twins, held them or seen photos of them. I have tried several times to contact your show to have the topic of grandparents suffering this sadness and heartbreak on your show but I imagine the thousands of requests your website gets every day is hard to manage. Loving and fit disenfranchised grandparents in North America need an advocate such as yourself to raise awareness of this quiet tragedy for all family members.

    Dr. Phil and Robin – can you even imagine not being a part of your grandchild’s life? I fervently hope you will contact me so that I can tell you my story or put you in touch with a couple in San Diego who have tried unsuccessfully to right this wrong.

    With regards,

    Nana Cat

  2. susan boyer says:

    Dear Dr. Phil and Robin, as a grandmother of 5 and I was there at the birth of all them. There is nothing like the feelings that overcome you when they place your baby’s baby in your arms. My grandchildren practical live at my house, I couldn’t get rid of them if I wanted too. Their ages range a 5,4,3and two 1 years old and they are the love of my lives. Enjoy them they will wrap you around their little fingers.

    Yours Truly
    Susan Boyer

  3. Korenna says:

    “I have learned to stay focused and take a pretty cerebral approach to life.”

    Just curious, how does Robin like your cerebral approach? She seems so emotionally connected and “soulish” for lack of a better word. Does she think you over analyze things? Catorigize them? Do you annoy her? JK But, really your approaches seem so different, how do you blend them?

    PS I just found out my 16 year old daughter is “Twittering” things I would rather she not say……swear words mostly. She doesn’t know that I know, is it spying? Should I let her know that not only can I see it but so can anyone else who knows her name? Or am I stalking her by finding her on Twitter and I am now invading her space?

  4. J.S. says:

    Hi Doc, I am touched by your eloquent expression of the joy of your child about to bring a child into the world…..imagine our heavenly fathers joy at the birth of each one of us….especially his only begotten son…Jesus Christ…our Lord and Savior…and now you are experiencing that same joy again as you must have with your first children….what a blessing…..may you also be blessed with this photograph of our Lord Jesus Christ….who is Gods first born so that we may all be reborn to him….amen…

  5. Donna says:

    Congratulations on becoming a grandparent! Our daughter had a little girl 7 months ago. We are totally in love. People told me how wonderful it would be, but I had no idea how sweet that little girl would be. Trust me. The best is yet to come!

    One Happy Grandmamma

  6. Dorie Poche says:

    Dear Dr. Phil,

    My husband & I are about the same ages as you & Robin. We have 3 grandkids and 1 on the way. We are called MawMaw Dorie & PawPaw Joe. I think as Southerners we need the MawMaw or PawPaw thing going on…and I think that PawPaw Phil would be so cute! It would say to the world, “Hey, I’m a proud Southern PawPaw!”

    A South Louisiana Fan,
    Dorie Poche

  7. Tanya Mercer says:

    I want to congradulate you on the up coming birth of your grandchild. Nothing compares to that arrival except the birth of you own child. I have three grandchildren. 2 grandsons, 1 granddaughter and another granddaughter on the way in April. Enjoy every moment. Because just like your own children they grow up way to fast.

    Tanya Mercer
    Mchenry, MS

  8. Lori says:

    Dear Dr. Phil and Robin-

    It’s simply the best – this wonderful new chapter in your lives! I had 3 children by the time I was 19, and it wasn’t until I was a grandmother (Nan, Nanny, Nanny Bananny) that I truly realized just what a miracle it is to be in the middle of so much love. I have 5 grandchildren now – all boys – and I’m lucky enough to have them living in the same town. In fact, I’m still living in the house where our children grew up, and the house is really the heart of the family- for 40 years now.

    Best wishes to you and your family, and prepare for the greatest moments of your lives.

    Happy Holidays-
    Peace Out-


  9. My Son Dustin and I came to see you the weekend before Jay and Erica were to get married. You and Mike Lipkin came with the “Power Within Conference” out in Denver, Colorado in 2006.

    It was a great time, although, I’m sure all you could think about was Robin and Jay at home preparing for the wedding. You apologised for your shirt being wrinkled because Robin wasn’t there and for us that bought the VIP seats.

    I’m sure that we all left there more excited about Jay and Erica’s Wedding than the conference itself as we all felt your heart and excitement.

    It has been an honor growing with your family over the years, and so proud for all of the McGraw’s.

    In Loving Memory of My Son Dustin C. Parker
    September 29.1985 to October 30.2006

  10. Daniel says:

    Hi there Dr. Phil

    Im Daniel Scholtz from South Africa, i absolutely love your show and watch it as often as i can, whenever i am not working, i liked your show on “its not that easy” that aired today here in South Africa, the one about over the counter prescriptions, a couple of years ago i have lost my mother because of drugs, she past because of a stomache ulcer caused by the drugs she baught in chemists no prescriptions needed, im realy happy you are making a diffrence with the over the counter drug consumers, and i do believe that a lot of people will have their eyes opend by your show,

    Dr. Phil i do have a few questions for you though a few personal questions, i did add my email addres in the top field, if i can get your advice and help it will be great please dr. Phil contact me or please let me know where exactly i can get in touch with you,

    a true follower to your advice.

    Daniel Scholtz.

  11. Paula says:

    Dear Robin and dr phil ,
    congratulations with the comming birth
    of you’re first grandchild !!!
    Also congratulations to the parents of course
    without them it would’nt happen .
    Lets hope the little girl has grandma’s hair ;-) )))

    Greatings from a Belgian fan

  12. canoehead says:


    I knew your were going to become a big softie once grandchildren came on the scene. Hope everyone is healthy and happy, and you get to spend hours gazing at the baby. I see a show on interpreting babies’ expressions in your future.

  13. JoAnn Nickerson says:

    CONGRATULATIONS to your entire family. And yes, grandparents do spoil their grandchildren like crazy. I am a stepmother and a step-grandmother as well. My husband has children from his previous marriage but unfortunately only recently that his daughter has reached out to me on Facebook me what a great stepmother I was. That made it REAL for me. I was indeed proud of that and it gave my husband some happiness as well. I hope his kids will someday be in our lives. Anyway, I think you two will be awesome grandparents and it will be a little crazy for awhile but this to shall pass. God bless all of you and enjoy these times just as you did with your sons!!!!

  14. Peggy Hoskins says:

    Happy Days beyond compare for you’re family.I am very proud for you and the little Miss Avery Mcgraw she is a lucky girl to have such an abundance of love support and totally real people in her corner.
    As happy as I am for you , Robin, Jay and Erica I am going to stop so as not to dampen your joy with my devastating loss of my 3 gbabies 2, 5 and 6.
    They are my life force and without doubt the sweet songs of my heart. I am not sure . Sorry:
    Enjoy the simplest purity that yaul are being blessed with.

  15. Terri Gibson says:

    Congratulations to all of you! My parents used to tell me they enjoyed the grandchildren so much more than they enjoyed us kids growing up because their job with them was simply to spoil them. When you are raising your own kids you are worried about everything (health, how will they turn out, what will they be when they grow up, etc.) we are so busy with worry we forget to spoil. However with grandchildren OMG they are so much fun. I have 2 granddaughters almost 6 & 7 and they are the joy of my life. I can spoil them rotten and then send them home. I am sure you and Robin will be overwhelmed with joy for many years to come and of course Jay and Erica will be very busy with all the responsibilities of parenthood.

  16. Yolande says:

    I am grandma to 2 wonderful grand kids a boy who is 12 and a little girl who is 9. My grandson could not say grandma so he calls me Uma to this date. My granddaughter when she was about 3 asked me if I was her grandmother and when I told her yes, she asked me if she could call me grandma. She used to hear her friends call their grandmother grandma. My granddaughter prides herself also that she was my 50th birthday present since she was born 5 days after my birthday. We love being grandparents and I am sure you will be wonderful grandparents as well.

  17. Gail B says:

    Dear Dr. Phil & Robin,& Jay & Erica.
    I wish you all good luck with your new baby and new grandbaby, beleave me we have 12 grandchildren between the too of us. I have 8 while my better half has 4. they are a dream for us both.. but it sure is nice when they go back to mom and dad at the end of the day,because we are exhausted. but we know you will love your granddaughter so much… congratulations to you all. and many more for you all.. ha ha.. we watch your show every day with out fail, and if we have to go out to say the Dr.s that day the show gets recorded. so we do not miss a thing.. so love and joy to you all. and may god bless your bundle of joy. and we really hope to be able to see the baby on your show soon.

  18. Michele Clarke says:

    Congrats to both you and Robin on the birth of your grand-daughter. I’m a grandmother of 3 (7 yrs, 5 yrs & 3 months) and the feeling of being one was so unexpected. Can’t describe it because it’s such a wonderful feeling!

    I told my son and daughter-in-law that the name “Nanna” shall never leave the lips of my grands. So the older ones call my “Grandmommy” and my husband, “Grand-daddy”. The best thing of being a grandparent is that you can undo everything the parents have done and send them back! ;)

    But, seriously, I love being a grandmother. You teach and be taught. It’s so wonderful sharing time with them. And Dr. Phil, I agree with Robin. Your grand-daughter is going to make you forget about psychology altogether. My husband called himself making my older grandson into a “man”, but when the girl came, he was snookered continuously! All she has to do is bat her lashes and he’s taken. Got a dollar out of him the other day.

    Since your grand has psychology in her blood–you’re in trouble!! So, again–to the two of you, a big and heartfelt congratulations!

    Grandmommy, Michele

  19. heartbrokengrandmother says:

    Congratulations Dr. Phil and Robin!!!

    I too was blessed with 2 wonderful grandchildren…and just like Catherine, December 14, 2009 above, my husband and I have found ourselves tangled up in the legal system of California petitioning for grandparent visitation. Their home environment is less than nurturing, and the nightmares you hear about LA County DCFS is absolutely true.

    As we navigate through the legal system we are finding that no one protects what is in the best interest of the children. Children are treated more like property rather than the feeling human beings they are.

    Catherine, Dr. Phil and Robin, please read the book “Grand Wishes” by Susan Hoffman. Your eyes will be opened to exactly how wide spread this is. Grandchildren everywhere are losing their rights to the love and meaningful relationships that come from extended family. This is not about the rights of grandparents, or the rights of parents, it is about the rights of innocent children.

    Again, congrats to you Dr. Phil and Robin…I’m sure when you look into the beautiful face of your new grandbaby, and she holds tight to your finger with her little hand, you will experience all the wonder you can imagine…now picture that being taken away.

    Best Wishes

    A heartbrokengrandmother

  20. Kylie says:

    Congratulations on your new granddaughter AVERY ELIZABETH!

    you guys must be over the moon right now

    take care xoxo

  21. Theresa Notte says:

    I read your web site comment that you posted when you held your Grandbaby and how you felt when she held your finger. I went through the same experience with my one and only Grandson who will be 18 at the end of Aprial. I can’t tell you how many times he has saved me. At my worst times in my life I would think of him,his smile laugh, and the fun we allways had together.I give him all of my heart even now and helped with money and did with out just for him. I could go on and on but I’ll stop here.I know you and your wife will be the best grandparent’s ever. That’s what my Grandson tell’s us now and it feel’s great! (his name is Nicholas and is graduating high school June 10 2010.)We cant wait foe that day,to watch him get his deploma and off to collage.)If you know of any way we can get some grants or funding I would be so thankfull.
    Theresa Notte

  22. barbara copeland says:

    Congratulations on your beautiful granddaughter. I was a career woman happily going along and found I was headed for grandmotherhood. My lovely daughter presented us with a 4lb. 15 oz. preemie. She is almost 8 and I would take a bullet for that girl. I lost my son in a car accident 25 years ago and I suddenly learned what was important in life. I thought that the pain would never go away and I found that I had the thought of ending the whole thing to stop the pain. I chose not to do that as God gave me the strength to crawl and then walk back into my life. I now have a grandson and I pray that joy will come into your life also. I understand that you think you can’t love anything as much as YOUR children but you can and do with grandchildren. I attended a taping of your show on April 13 and want to commend you and your staff for the kind and thoughtful treatment we received. We felt that we belonged and were important. I wish the very best to you and Robin in your new role. I want to attend another of your shows as I tape it twice a day so I won’t miss it. I watch every one. Thanks from a North Caroline fan.

  23. Kathy says:

    Hello Dr. Phil; I just read where you are now A PROUD GRANDPARENT!!! You & Robin will be exellent grandparents. It was STRANGE that I stumbled on this today of ALL days. WHY??? TODAY is my parents 50th WEDDING ANNERVASARY!!! You bet THE GOLGEN!!!! My parents were married in 1960, and had 2 children; ther is me (Kathy) born January 1965, and then my brother who was born July 1971. They are also grandparents of 3. They have twin grandaughters who are 23 years old and a grandson who is 21 years old. GOD BLESS YOUR FAMILY and hope you all have a wonderful life. Sincerely, Kathy, from Vincennes IN

  24. Lee-Ann Posthumus says:

    Hi I’m writing to you from Johannesburg South Africa Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful Grandchild; Avery Elizabeth, I pray that she will bring your many wonderful hours of joy and that your Family will continue to be Blessed abundantly.

    Thank-you for a wonderful show and for all the valuable advice.

    God Bless with love from Sunny South Africa – Yours Sincerely Lee-Ann Posthumus

  25. Kay says:

    A huge congratulations! We are grandparents of 5 grandchildren and 3 step-grans.
    We love them all so very much. They are all products of our children’s growing up years and we tease them that they are getting pay-backs for all of those little things that they put us through. :) Our daughter and family are living with us now and so we have the 3 girls, ages 7,5,3, around all the time. All they have to do is every morning, say I love you and that starts our day out in the right way. All their years now have blessed us with each growing stepping stone. Their first Christmas. Number 1 birthday. And so on….but the most important thing is to keep God in their young life and teach them what LOVE is what its all about. Even during conflicts. You can teach them on how to get through a rough spot…ending that you and God love them no matter what. We are very careful that their parents are the ones whose rules must be kept number 1. Yes, we do have to do some correcting at times since they live with us, however, I try to keep the spanking to only the times their lives are in danger. You’ll love every minute and don’t forget every time that you go shopping, a little book or something will make them light up like a light bulb. Ha!

    I watch you every day, so be sure to put all the little things about Avery on your show. Ha!! I love your show….keep up the good work.

    God Bless you both as you enjoy and be blessed by this new little one.
    Kay from Georgia

  26. Nikki Stigley says:

    A huge congratulations from down here in New Zealand to the littliest McGraw. She looks like such a wee button and is the luckiest wee girl to have been born into such a loving family.

    I have a 4yr old grandson and an 18mth old grandaughter and they are the most special gifts in my life. They call me Nanny.

    Erica and Jay – laugh and love through every moment of Avery Elizabeth’s life and Robin and Dr Phil – I am sure you will be the most devoted and loving grandparents to your darling wee Avery Elizabeth.

  27. Mary Fox says:

    please do not forget this baby has TWO sets of Grandparents!!!

  28. I’m not sure why or how I lost so much weight after both my boys were born (and since I’m not in the habit of inspecting the teeth of gift horses I’ll say I don’t really care), but I was never this “thin” before having them.

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