People can prepare themselves before the event, (or all the time) by the language they use, the thoughts they think, and a commitment to watch and control their own responses. I’m disappointed and believe it’s wrong to call someone a “jerk” or to play that endless loop tape of yesterday. Remember the pancake, two-sided?

This is a time to let go of the problems, including name-calling. It’s a time to offer ourselves to the most obnoxious, hard-to-love family and friends. Just like Jesus. Instead of dodging and darting around to avoid having to speak to the other imperfect works-in-progress, walk right up to them, look them in the eye and ask about their well-being. Listen to the answers. I find that I feel better about myself and them. Most of the dread leaves. It can be surprising then, how little that person requires of us. Listen. Really. And even if the new response does nothing but feed the smug self-righteousness of the arrogant, (a little bit in all of us) maybe there’s a little less friction with others. Take the high road. Seek to serve others, like Jesus. It works. Feel your heart shift. Step carefully, you might have too much fun.

At times when I’ve disagreed with you, I’ve thought about asking you to have a sparring match. It could get lively. I hope I’m not shooting myself in the foot by offering a couple of observations. Several times I’ve heard you say that you’re the least judgmental person you know. Phil, that’s a judgement, of millions of people whom you judge to be more judgemental than you. Calling someone a jerk fits in somewhere.

Jesus said “That which you have done for the least of these, so have you done for me.” Maybe we are the least of these.